To Paris, with love

Now I know why the Parisians are so glam and slim, the lucky buggers. Other than living in one of the most beautiful and vibrant cities in the world, their diet, shops and Metro system ensure that they are always kitted out in the height of fashion and get a daily cardiovascular workout thrown in for free (I guess that the chain smoking and genetics help somewhat too).
The Mediterranean diet, fine red wine and endless boulevards of gourmet restaurants are one of the perks I love most about visiting Paris - and its all good value for money - and I don't have to wonder how I'm going to work off my culinary over-indulgences because all I have to do is spend the day walking down the Champs-Élysées, or around the boutique stores of the Marais, or around one of the many picture-perfect jardins, or, and this is probably the most effective in terms of getting the heart-rate up, I can take the Metro!
The sadistic Parisians have designed the subways and trains in such a way as to maximise the number of stairs possible to fit inside an underground system without having to do some serious geographic alterations. Many a time I have wondered why, especially while lugging around a suitcase that would otherwise be a pleasure if I could only take advantage of the fact that it was on wheels, after just having reached the top of a long staircase, I am forced back down a long line of steps. Why couldn't they just have built it flat in the first place? In a straight line instead of up, down, up, down, up, down? And all the Parisian ladies are stepping daintily around in stilettos like they are made of floating barbie dolls, Vogue cigarette in one hand, Louis Vuitton in the other, like steps are almost impercetable. If I had any French genes running down my family line once upon a time, they are long gone now!